Times

The past two months at Sandy Cove have been filled with joy and a lot of pain. I keep getting told you know your growuing when you can sense some growth along with pain. And I gotta be honest I am tired of the pain. Growing is something that gives motivation but can be crippling. In the one sense, sweet I am gaining a better understanding of who I. But the other I am so broken and i have a lot that I have swept under the rug.

God is calling me out time and time again. I feel like a lil kid, I know what I did and I wanna hide under the bed and hope He doesnt find me out. The Shadow of Christ is to vast for me to hide from and im glad for that i cannot. I have been in some serious grace and love from my heavenly Father as I walk with my hand in front of me because this whole experience feels like im in the dark. These past two months have been times of renewal and times of growth. Times of anger, times of fustrastion, times of despair, times of lonelyness, times of being lost, times of being found, times of love, times of joy, times of laughter, and times of happeiness. God is good and when i have found myself on that rock with the waves all around me I am at peace becasue he has got my back. I have come to in these times over the last two months come to see how great the love of a father is for his son.

Being a man from a fatherless childhood this concept has always escaped me. There is a God who is my father that cares? That wont turn away or hide his loving words from me. That knows me, and desires depth from me. That's crazy to me, it may not e to some but to me it is foreign. God in all His greatness and power wants someone like me, broken and fatherless. Thats insane. And empoering. I have been called by my Father for more than living in the idea that i am a fatherless runt who will amount to nothing.

I have been in converge for two months and they have been a great two months of seeing God work. Seeing me get beat up and broken so God can oull the iniquity out. I am glad I have taken this different path.