Where is the love?

The past couple days I have gotten to spend it at Camp Hebron at the sectionals for CCCA. I will be honest going into it I was not looking forward to it but it is funny how times like that you get surprised and learn so much. We had the honor of hearing Duffy Robbins speak, and man did he speak and hit me with a new truth each time.

One example in particularly that he spoke on hit me like a brick. He said that when speaking to a group at an event he had a young girl come up on the stage and act like she was holding a cup of water and he bumped into her and said hey you spilled. He asked her, do you know what came out of that cup? Looking at him confused, she said water because that is what was inside it. Duffy then proceeded to say imagine if you being filled with the holy spirit and someone bumps into you, what comes out? What if that was a truth for us all. What if when someone bumped into you and Christs love came out, the grace of God came out. What if the irrational passion of a Father that came and humbled himself and died came out. How radical of a thought and sad to think that doesn't always happen. Is this something that can be accomplished? Is it possible that when you get cut off on the highway or wrongly judged to show Christ and love? Is it possible that when you are outside of church and life happens that you could be a christian and act like Christ? Or did I miss the part in Sunday school where it says the world shall over come?

No! Christ is greater and is greater still and should be in our lives. Being Christlike is not something that is easy. It is not all rainbows and sunshine, it comes at a cost. And the hardest thing to do is to love those around you, but why?

Another story that impacted me this weekend goes as such: There is a block party and this guy who is there enjoying the party and food is talking with some people. Some time goes on and he feels a tug on his shirt, he looks down to find a girl of about the age of 2 with arms held high. We understand this as the sign for hold me. He has no idea who this little girl is or who she belongs to. His fingers covered in sauce says not now honey I am busy. Time goes by and a little bit later he feels a tug at his shirt. It is the same girl, again he says not now I am busy. He then proceeds to watch as she goes around the table only to be denied each time. He is wondering where is this girls mother, her father? He soon forgets and engages back into conversation. Some time later he looks up to see a man jump in the pool with all his clothes on, people rushing over. Naturally he does the same to see what is going on. To find the man pulling a small body from the water to the side as quick as he can. People are trying to breath life into this small body which he now sees is the little girl. By the time they herd the sounds of the EMS they knew she was gone. Now emotions flowing, this man who had denied her twice of attention is thinking why. He finds out a few days later that this was not the first time that the girl had jumped in a pool. Her mother was marrying a guy who did not want her and so she did not receive love, so to get attention she would jump in the pool. Only this time no one noticed.

Who in your life is reaching out for love and you are not showing it? Are we letting those that are around us drown? Are we showing the love of God? This was something I wrestled with. Not only had I been challenged with when people interact with me is Christ coming out, but now I am being asked am I truly loving through Christ? Because apart for God I can do nothing. My world was being shaken, my heart hoping that people in my life felt that I loved on them. But the reality of seeing I can do better and show the love of Christ better.

The kingdom of God is already here in the way we reach out to others. One day we will see the physical kingdom but we can represent the kingdom in how we live. Christ likeness is not saying how can I be perfect, but how can I serve others, reach out to the needy and represent the Father. It is obedience to Christ and saying I want for nothing. Saying that my heart is at the plow but ready for the alter. I will do the work of God until He calls me home. And why? Because He loved and didn't have to. So I ask why love, because God has called you to. Speak life and love into peoples lives, don't let your neighbor drown while you have the peace that is Christ.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

I Get It, I'm desperate.

Remember going to summer camps and getting on that spiritual high (most likely from all the Mountain Dew) going crazy for God and saying I am gonna change? Do you remember the week after when your like crap I need to go back to camp to get back on fire, or maybe to go back and see the girl you met at the mud pit. Either way you realized something is wrong and you start wondering did I hear God. I was that kid. I didn't take it serious and God has way of getting our attention. I remember finally growing out of that and saying alright God faith needs a little WD-40 and spit to work I cant just sit around.

After that moment God hasn't given up on showing me more and more of Him and making me work. I have seen God work but for the longest time I would always say to my mom; I don't understand how people say they hear God I don't hear him. I struggled with this idea, was I not good enough, was I not strong enough in my faith, was it just that I was spiritually hard of hearing, was I to go light a bush on fire and hope God would talk to me? I was so lost on this concept.

I finally got it, I had my duh moment. So when I prayed, hey God I am thinking that I want to go college, and I don't know where. You send people I have never met or told of my plans and they say go to LBC and you provide the money maybe that's you talking. Or I say God I am broken show me what you want from my life and what you are trying to teach me. And I can't pick up the bible or my devotional book without you saying abide in me and I will overfill your cup if you trust in me. Maybe I should listen, maybe I get it.

God has been so good to me and I have overlooked it. God has blessed us with life each and everyday, is it to much to ask for us to be desperate for him, I mean he only paid for us with his son. Do you wake up each and everyday saying, I can't wait to meet with my Father. I know that's a question I wasn't asking for a long time and now I don't know why God didn't just slap me. As much as you value each breath you should value God ten times more. God is speaking just take time and listen. He desires us more than anything, why do you think love is so talked about in the bible. For he so loved, so why cant you? Listen and be desperate for a father who loves you. God will show you the plans he has for your life.

So next time you think, I wish God would call just look around you might feel dumb and have a duh moment because God is trying to show you something. Seek first the Kingdom and then live it.

Broken

Life is not always what we expect. It does not work out how we want or see it. Our desires are not a must. God is not a candy machine that we pay a dollar and get a pay day. But we treat him that way, I know i do at times. I expect God to fix everything. I feel like a lot of times we think I will pray about and wait for God to take care of it. But that is not how it works. We have to put the work in for something to happen. What does one do when you have no idea what God wants? What can you do when you have no idea out of the many things to cry out to God about?

These are questions that i was struggling over, and I felt completely lost. A good friend of mine spoke on the idea of being in "the land between" over the summer. This idea comes from the people of Israel time in the wilderness. God had a plan for them and saved them from slavery only for His people to complain and go against his will. They were stuck and waiting on what God had next. This idea can be so easily translated into our lives. We want to know what is next and how to get it done. We always are looking for the cliff notes in life's situation. But we have to have faith in the good and bad.

I'm saying that after struggling to do so. I have over the last few weeks struggled with the lack of growth and not seeing God work in my life. Part of it might have been my heart filling with bitterness, I was not accepting some things happening around me or feeling like I had some injustice was done. I was just like the people of God complaining and unhappy with God.

But if i would have just been aiding in God I would have dealt with my bitterness. But I wasn't I wanted my way and to fix it on my own. This lead to frustration after frustration and I couldn't figure it out. I started think man God has got this wrong I am unhappy and I don't think I am where I need to be. Who am I to think I know better than God. I remember a night or two before new years eve literally crying out to God. Asking why I felt the way I did, what was he doing with me, what did he want from me, and if I was where he wanted. I was at my breaking point.

Feeling broken is not fun. Realizing that I have been fighting for my will and not even taking the time to pray if that was God will for me really made me think. Then God when I thought he had forgotten me answers in ways I did not expect. He sends people to say things like, Hey you are a blessing and you don't know it, or hey your where you are supposed to be and God is going to use you. I didn't tell anyone but God what I had been feeling. Right when I gave up my will and felt like I couldn't go on God sends word.

I see now my heart was hard and my ears closed because of pride and not allowing time for my Father. A good friend of mine Aaron said if your investing in Christ and putting time in with him always seeking Him and what he wants, He will make His desires something you desire. I have felt a peace since that, I have felt more at peace waking up and making time for God. I do not think I will not find more troubles along the way but I have something that satisfies and I need to always seek that. It is hard to trust what you can not see but that is faith, I have a God that can meet my spiritual needs why cannot I trust for the physical as well? This is something that is a growing point for me and something I am getting better at. Life is not what we expect, it is not something that works out how we want or see it, and it is not about what we desire. And I am so happy about that, because I have a God that is working that out and has me in his hands.

CHRISTIAN! here is all thou canst require. To make thee happy thou wantest something that shall satisfy thee; and is not this enough? If thou canst pour this promise into thy cup, wilt thou not say, with David, "My cup runneth over; I have more than heart can wish"? When this is fulfilled, "I am thy God," art thou not possessor of all things? Desire is insatiable as death, but He who filleth all in all can fill it. The capacity of our wishes who can measure? but the immeasurable wealth of God can more than overflow it. I ask thee if thou art not complete when God is thine? -Charles Spurgeon